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gratitude for God's grace reflected in Jesus' forgiveness

Grace, Forgiveness, and a Heart of Gratitude

This week’s teaching from Luke 7 invites us to consider what happens when we truly recognize how deeply God loves and forgives us. Gratitude for God’s grace changes the way we see ourselves, other people, and the hope Jesus offers us, reminding us that it is never too late to receive God’s grace and begin again.

This Week’s Sermon: A Loving Heart Has Gratitude


Key Takeaways

  • Gratitude for God’s grace begins when we recognize our own need for forgiveness rather than comparing our sin with someone else’s.
  • Jesus shows us that no one is beyond God’s grace, regardless of their past, shame, or brokenness.
  • The woman in Luke 7 responds to Jesus with extravagant gratitude because she understands the depth of the forgiveness she has received.
  • Pride and resentment can keep us from experiencing genuine gratitude by convincing us that we have less need for grace than others.
  • Jesus offers forgiveness, peace, and the hope of a new heart and a new life to every person.

Sermon Highlights: Gratitude for God’s Grace

Sometimes we can become so familiar with grace that we forget how extraordinary it really is. We know the language of forgiveness. We know that God loves us. But what happens when we actually stop and recognize how much we have been forgiven?

Luke 7 gives us a picture of two very different responses to Jesus. One person believes he has little need for grace. Another realizes she has been given something she could never earn. Their responses reveal something important about gratitude for God’s grace: our gratitude grows when we begin to understand just how deeply we are loved and forgiven.

Big Idea of This Week’s Teaching

The heart of this teaching is simple: when we recognize the depth of God’s grace and forgiveness, it changes the way we live.

Jesus tells the story of two people whose debts were forgiven. One owed a great deal, while the other owed much less. Neither could pay what they owed, but both were forgiven. Jesus then asks which person will love the moneylender more. Simon gives the obvious answer: the one who was forgiven more.

Jesus is helping Simon see that gratitude is connected to our awareness of grace. The issue isn’t that some people need forgiveness and others don’t. We all do. The difference is whether we recognize it.

“Jesus wants Simon to understand that when people come face to face with their own brokenness, they are undone to their core by the love of God.”


Key Scriptures

Luke 7:41–43

Jesus tells Simon about two people whose debts were forgiven. The story becomes a picture of how our understanding of forgiveness shapes our response to God.

Luke 7:44–47

Jesus contrasts Simon’s lack of hospitality with the woman’s extravagant expression of love. Her actions demonstrate gratitude because she understands the forgiveness she has received.

Luke 7:48

Jesus tells the woman, “Your sins are forgiven.” Her past does not have the final word over her life.

Luke 7:50

Jesus tells her, “Your faith has saved you; go in peace.” The story ends with an invitation into peace, hope, and a new way of living.


1. Gratitude for God’s Grace Starts with Seeing Our Own Need

    Simon was a religious leader. He likely saw himself as someone who had lived a relatively good life. Compared with the woman who entered his home, he didn’t think he had much to be forgiven for.

    But Jesus challenges that way of thinking. Simon assumes he has a smaller debt, while the woman has a much larger one. Jesus’ point is that both are in need of forgiveness.

    That can be uncomfortable because comparison is easy. We can look at someone else’s choices, mistakes, or past and convince ourselves that we are doing pretty well. But comparison can keep us from recognizing our own need for grace.

    Gratitude for God’s grace begins when we stop measuring ourselves against other people and become honest about our own hearts. We don’t have to pretend we’re perfect. We can come to Jesus as we are and receive the grace we need.

    2. Gratitude for God’s Grace Changes How We See Others

      The woman in this story had a painful history and carried shame, wounds, and loneliness. She knew she was not welcome at Simon’s dinner, but she came because she had heard Jesus teach about grace. She believed something Simon struggled to believe: that God’s love could reach even someone like her.

      Her response was deeply personal. She knelt at Jesus’ feet, wept, wiped his feet with her hair, kissed them, and poured perfume on them. Her actions weren’t about earning forgiveness. They were an expression of gratitude because she had encountered the love of Jesus.

      The story also challenges the way we think about people we believe are beyond forgiveness. There may be someone in our lives whom we have labeled as too far gone, too difficult, or too broken for God’s grace.

      But Jesus sees people differently. Gratitude for God’s grace reminds us that we stand on the same ground as everyone else. We are all people who need grace, and we are all deeply loved by God.

      3. Gratitude for God’s Grace Frees Us from Pride and Resentment

        The greatest problem in Simon’s home that day wasn’t the sin he noticed in the woman. Jesus points toward something much closer to Simon’s own heart: ingratitude. Simon had pride and held resentment. He judged the woman and believed that he was better than her and therefore had less reason to be grateful.

        That is a warning worth taking seriously. We can know about God’s love without allowing that love to transform our hearts. We can become so focused on what other people have done wrong that we lose sight of what God has forgiven in us.

        Gratitude for God’s grace invites humility. It allows us to let go of the need to prove that we’re better than someone else. It softens our hearts and helps us become people who are more willing to forgive, serve, love, and welcome others.

        Jesus doesn’t minimize sin. Instead, he puts sin in the context of a grace that is greater than our failure.

        4. Gratitude for God’s Grace Gives Us Hope for a New Life

          The woman entered that room carrying her past, but she left with peace. Jesus knew everything about her. He knew her history, her shame, her failures, and the broken places in her life. And he still loved her.

          That may be one of the most hopeful parts of the story. God doesn’t love an edited version of us. Jesus knows us completely and still offers grace.

          “Peace. The peace of knowing that God knows you to your core, every dark corner of your inner and outer life—and he loves you with everything he has.”

          The sermon reminds us that Jesus came to bring hope to all people. He went to the cross, died, and rose again so that we could have hope, a new heart, and a new life.

          Gratitude for God’s grace isn’t simply looking backward at what God has forgiven. It also gives us the courage to look forward. Because of Jesus, our past does not have to determine our future.


          Practicing This Week

          1. Take an honest look at your own heart. Instead of comparing yourself with someone else, ask God to help you recognize where you need grace.
          2. Name something God has forgiven you for. Spend a few quiet moments thanking God specifically for his forgiveness and love.
          3. Consider someone you have struggled to extend grace toward. Ask God to help you see that person through the lens of the same grace you have received.
          4. Let go of one resentment. This doesn’t mean ignoring what happened or pretending it didn’t hurt. It means beginning to release your desire to hold the offense over someone else.
          5. Practice gratitude. Look for one ordinary opportunity each day to remember that God’s love isn’t something you earned. It is a gift.

          Questions for Reflection

          1. Where do you see yourself most clearly in the story of Jesus, Simon, and the woman?
          2. How does recognizing your own need for forgiveness change the way you see other people?
          3. Is there someone you have been tempted to consider beyond God’s grace?
          4. What is one thing you can thank God for today when you consider his forgiveness?
          5. How might receiving Jesus’ grace help you experience greater peace in your life?

          The story in Luke 7 ultimately brings us back to Jesus. He is the one who sees us completely and loves us completely. He is the one who meets shame with grace, pride with an invitation to humility, and brokenness with the promise of new life.

          None of us has it all together or a debt small enough to make grace unnecessary. But none of us is beyond the reach of God’s love either.

          Gratitude for God’s grace begins when we allow ourselves to receive what Jesus freely offers. We don’t have to earn it, perform for it, or become worthy enough for it. We can simply come to Jesus, acknowledge our need, and receive his forgiveness and peace.

          As we do, our hearts begin to change. We become less consumed with comparison and more aware of grace. Less defined by resentment and more shaped by love. Less focused on what we deserve and more grateful for what Jesus has given. And that is the invitation: to know that we are forgiven, deeply loved, and never beyond the reach of God’s grace.

          Pastor teaching about welcoming truth tellers during Sunday worship

          Why Welcoming Truth Tellers Leads to Spiritual Growth

          What happens when someone who truly loves us tells us a hard truth? This week’s message explored how welcoming truth tellers is one of the most important steps toward spiritual growth, showing us that God often uses trusted people to reveal our blind spots, deepen our faith, and lead us into greater freedom.

          This Week’s Sermon: The Need for Truth Tellers


          Key Takeaways

          • Spiritual growth begins when we’re willing to hear the truth about ourselves.
          • God often uses trusted people to help us recognize our blind spots.
          • Pride resists correction, but humility welcomes opportunities to grow.
          • Truth spoken with love leads to freedom, not shame.
          • Jesus invites us to become people who both receive and speak truth with grace.

          Sermon Highlights: Welcoming Truth Tellers

          Most of us appreciate encouragement. We enjoy hearing what we’re doing well and being reminded of our strengths. But what about those moments when someone lovingly points out something we need to change?

          Those conversations are rarely comfortable. Our first instinct is often to defend ourselves, explain our actions, or simply avoid the subject altogether. Yet those very moments can become some of the greatest opportunities for spiritual growth.

          This week’s teaching reminded us that welcoming truth tellers isn’t about inviting criticism into our lives. It’s about making room for the people God uses to lovingly help us become more like Christ.

          “God is consistently sending you truth tellers. He is constantly. He has people he’s trying to put into your life to tell you truths.”

          Big Idea of This Week’s Teaching

          Real spiritual growth happens when we humble ourselves enough to welcome truth from God and from trusted people who genuinely love us. Rather than avoiding correction or becoming defensive, Jesus invites us to embrace truth because “the truth will set you free.”


          Key Scriptures

          John 8:31–32

          Jesus tells His followers that those who remain in His teaching will know the truth, and the truth will set them free. Throughout the message, this became the foundation for understanding that truth isn’t meant to condemn us—it is meant to free us.

          Proverbs 19:11

          “A person’s wisdom yields patience; it is to one’s glory to overlook an offense.”

          The pastor shared how this verse became a defining moment in his own life when his mother lovingly confronted his tendency to become easily offended, illustrating how wisdom often comes through difficult conversations.

          2 Samuel 11–12

          David’s sin with Bathsheba and Nathan’s courageous confrontation demonstrate the importance of having someone willing to lovingly speak truth into our lives. David’s eventual repentance shows that humility opens the door to restoration.


          1. Welcoming Truth Tellers Begins with Humility

          One of the most powerful contrasts in the message came through two personal stories. As a nineteen-year-old, the pastor resisted his mother’s loving correction. He didn’t want to hear what she had to say because, like many of us, he believed he already knew enough.

          Years later, however, he had a similar conversation with his own daughter. Instead of becoming defensive, she thanked him for speaking honestly because she had already been asking God to help her grow.

          The difference wasn’t age. The difference was humility.

          When we ask God to shape us, we become far more open to hearing difficult truths. Welcoming truth tellers starts long before someone speaks into our lives—it begins with a heart that genuinely desires to grow.

          2. Welcoming Truth Tellers Helps Us See Our Blind Spots

          One of the challenges every person faces is that we can clearly see the faults of others while remaining unaware of our own. King David is a striking example.

          After his sin with Bathsheba, David spent months attempting to hide his choices instead of confronting them honestly. It wasn’t until the prophet Nathan courageously confronted him that David finally recognized the condition of his own heart.

          Nathan wasn’t trying to shame David. He loved him enough to tell him the truth.

          That’s what welcoming truth tellers looks like. It’s recognizing that trusted people often see things we cannot see ourselves. Their honesty isn’t meant to tear us down—it is God’s invitation toward healing, repentance, and freedom. The message challenged us to consider whether we’ve unintentionally pushed away the very people God has placed in our lives to help us grow.

          3. Welcoming Truth Tellers Leads to Freedom

          Jesus never promised that truth would always be comfortable. He promised it would set us free.

          “You will know the truth and the truth will set you free.”

          Sometimes we carry unnecessary burdens because we’ve become experts at justifying ourselves. We avoid difficult conversations, explain away unhealthy habits, or convince ourselves that everything is fine when our hearts are quietly growing harder.

          Welcoming truth tellers interrupts that pattern. Instead of allowing pride to keep us isolated, we become teachable. We begin seeing correction not as rejection but as evidence of God’s love.

          Like David, we discover that confession is not the end of the story—it is often the beginning of restoration. Rather than fearing truth, followers of Jesus can embrace it because God’s grace is always greater than our failures.

          4. Welcoming Truth Tellers Creates a Community of Grace

          Near the end of the message, the pastor asked one of the most personal questions of the morning: “Who is the Nathan in your life?” Most of us can think of people who encourage us, make us laugh, or simply enjoy spending time with us. But do we have someone who knows us well enough—and loves us enough—to tell us the truth when we’re drifting?

          The sermon reminded us that truth tellers aren’t harsh critics. They’re people marked by integrity, wisdom, courage, and genuine love. They don’t point out flaws to win an argument or prove a point. They speak honestly because they want what’s best for us.

          At the same time, the message challenged us to consider whether we’ve made it difficult for people to be honest with us. Sometimes pride shows up in subtle ways. We become defensive, dismiss wise counsel, or surround ourselves with people who only tell us what we want to hear.

          Instead, God invites us to practice welcoming truth tellers by cultivating hearts that are teachable and open to His work. When we do, our relationships grow deeper, our faith becomes stronger, and we experience the freedom Jesus promised.


          Practicing This Week

          1. Ask God to reveal any areas where pride or defensiveness may be keeping you from growing.
          2. Identify one trusted person whose wisdom you respect, and invite them to speak honestly into your life.
          3. Spend time reading John 8:31–32 and 2 Samuel 11–12, asking God to help you respond to truth with humility.
          4. Before receiving Communion this week, pray that Jesus would soften your heart and help you become more open to His leading.
          5. Thank someone who has lovingly challenged you in the past, recognizing how God has used them in your journey.

          Questions for Reflection

          1. Who has God placed in your life that consistently speaks truth with love?
          2. When someone offers correction, what is usually your first response?
          3. Are there areas where you’ve been avoiding God’s invitation to grow?
          4. How does David’s response to Nathan encourage you when you think about your own mistakes?
          5. What would change in your life if you intentionally practiced welcoming truth tellers?

          None of us sees ourselves perfectly. That’s why God’s grace is such a gift.

          He doesn’t expose our blind spots to shame us. He reveals them because He loves us too much to leave us where we are. Throughout Scripture, we see God patiently inviting people back to Himself, offering forgiveness, restoration, and hope.

          May we become people who are known for welcoming truth tellers, trusting that God’s loving correction always leads us toward greater freedom, deeper joy, and a closer walk with Christ.

          restoration through Jesus after failure empty tomb light

          When You Feel Like a Failure, Jesus Restores

          This week’s teaching explored how the message of Easter is ultimately about restoration through Jesus after failure. No matter how deep our shame or how many times we fall, God’s desire is to restore us and bring us back into relationship with Him—starting right now.

          This Week’s Easter Sermon: Restoring Hope


          Key Takeaways

          • God created you good, and His desire is to restore that goodness in you.
          • Failure often leads to shame, but Jesus offers restoration instead of condemnation.
          • Restoration through Jesus after failure is always possible—no matter your past.
          • The resurrection shows that failure is never the end of your story.
          • God doesn’t just restore you—He wants to use your life for something meaningful.

          Sermon Highlights: Restoration Through Jesus After Failure

          We all know what it feels like to fail. Sometimes it’s something small—a harsh word or a missed opportunity. At other times, it runs deeper: broken relationships, regrets we can’t shake, or patterns we can’t seem to escape. As a result, failure doesn’t just leave us with guilt—it often leaves us with shame.

          In those moments, a quiet voice whispers, “Something is wrong with me.” Because of that, we begin to hide—from others, from ourselves, and even from God.

          Big Idea of This Week’s Teaching

          The heart of this week’s message is simple and powerful: restoration through Jesus is always available to you. More than that, Easter isn’t just about what happened to Jesus—it’s about what is happening in you right now. Because of His death and resurrection, Jesus restores what was broken and invites us back into the life we were created for.


          Key Scriptures

          • Genesis 1:26–31 — Humanity is created in God’s image and called “very good,” reminding us of our original design and worth.
          • Genesis 3 — The fall introduces failure, shame, and hiding, showing the brokenness we all experience.
          • 2 Corinthians 5 — Through Jesus, we become a new creation and are restored into relationship with God.

          1. Restoration Through Jesus: Going Back to the Beginning

          We were created good. That’s where the story starts—not with failure, but with purpose, beauty, and identity. Being made in the image of God means your life carries meaning and value.

          But just a few chapters later, everything changes. In Genesis 3, failure enters the story. And with it comes shame. Adam and Eve don’t just realize they’ve done something wrong—they begin to hide. That instinct is still alive in us today. When we fail, we withdraw. We cover up. We avoid.

          And over time, we can forget who we really are. This is why restoration through Jesus after failure matters so deeply—it reconnects us to who we were created to be.

          2. Restoration Through Jesus Breaks the Cycle of Shame

          There’s an important distinction in the message: guilt versus shame.

          Guilt says, “I did something wrong.”
          Shame says, “Something is wrong with me.”

          Shame isolates. It keeps us stuck. It convinces us that we’re beyond repair. But Jesus steps into that exact space. Through His life, death, and resurrection, He doesn’t just deal with our actions—He restores our identity. He doesn’t turn away from our failure; He moves toward it with grace.

          Restoration through Jesus means you no longer have to hide. You can come into the light, fully known, and still fully loved.

          3. Restoration Through Jesus Is the Heart of Easter

          Easter is not just about forgiveness—it’s about restoration. Even Jesus’ closest followers failed Him. They fell asleep when He asked them to stay awake. When things got hard, they ran away. Even after the resurrection, they still doubted.

          “Failure is actually part of being a disciple, part of following Christ.”

          And yet, these same people were restored—and then used by God to change the world. That’s the pattern of the gospel. Failure is not the end. Restoration is. Restoration through Jesus is what turns ordinary, broken people into people of purpose, courage, and hope.

          4. Restoration Through Jesus Changes How We Live

          This message isn’t just theological—it’s deeply personal. Where do you need restoration right now?

          Maybe it’s in your family.
          It could be in your emotional life.
          Or it may show up in your marriage, your work, or your sense of purpose.

          Wherever you feel the weight of failure, Jesus meets you there. And not just to forgive—but to restore. Restoration through Jesus means your story is still being written. It means God is not done with you. It means even your failures can become part of something meaningful.

          “You cannot fail too many times for me to keep running after you.”


          Practicing This Week

          • Take time to identify one area where you feel stuck in shame and bring it honestly to God.
          • Read Genesis 1 and remind yourself of your identity as someone created “very good.”
          • Reflect on 2 Corinthians 5 and what it means to be a “new creation.”
          • Instead of hiding, share honestly with a trusted person.
          • Likewise, practice receiving grace rather than trying to earn it.

          Questions for Reflection

          • Where in your life do you most feel the weight of failure or shame?
          • What does restoration through Jesus after failure look like in that area right now?
          • Are you more likely to hide or to bring things into the light? Why?
          • So, what would change if you truly believed God wants to restore you?
          • How might God use your past failures for something good?

          The message of Easter is not that you have to fix yourself. It’s that Jesus meets you in your failure and restores you. Right now. Not someday.

          Restoration through Jesus is not just possible—it’s already being offered to you. And wherever you are in your story, you are not beyond His grace. In fact, you are still being restored.

          freedom through surrender to God as we trust Jesus with our whole lives

          How Letting Go Can Lead to Real Freedom

          This week’s teaching explored freedom through surrender to God and the surprising way Jesus turns our assumptions upside down. In a world that tells us to hold on tighter, prove ourselves, and stay in control, Jesus offers another way: letting go, trusting him, and discovering a deeper kind of hope.

          This Week’s Sermon: Surrendering My Life to God


          Key Takeaways

          • Jesus teaches that real life is found not in self-protection, but in self-giving love.
          • Surrender is not the same as giving up; it is choosing to trust God more than our own control.
          • The way of Jesus invites us to release self-centeredness and become people who serve others.
          • Even in suffering, Jesus points us toward hope, resurrection, and transformation.
          • Loving God with our whole heart, soul, mind, and strength means opening every part of our lives to him.

          Sermon Highlights: Freedom Through Surrender to God

          There are seasons when many of us feel like we have to hold everything together. We try to manage the outcome, protect ourselves from loss, and make sure we do not fall behind. We want control because control feels safer than uncertainty.

          But over time, that way of living can leave us tired. It can make us anxious, guarded, and stuck inside ourselves. This week’s message invited us to consider a different path, one that sounds risky at first but leads somewhere good: freedom through surrender to God in the everyday moments of real life.

          Big Idea of This Week’s Teaching

          The big idea this week was simple and challenging: freedom through surrender to God is the way of Jesus. Instead of clinging to control, proving ourselves, or trying to win at all costs, Jesus invites us to trust him with our whole selves. In that surrender, we do not lose what matters most. We begin to find real life.


          Key Scriptures

          • Mark 12:30
            Jesus reminds us to love God with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength. This passage framed the message by showing that faith is not partial or compartmentalized. God invites our whole lives.
          • Mark 8:31–35
            Jesus tells his followers that he will suffer, be rejected, die, and rise again, and then calls them to deny themselves, take up their cross, and follow him. This passage showed that the way of Jesus is not control or domination, but surrender, trust, and hope.
          • Galatians 2:20
            Paul says, “I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me.” This passage helped show that surrender is not the end of life, but the beginning of transformation.

          1. Freedom through surrender to God begins with letting go of control

          One of the clearest movements in the sermon was the contrast between the way of the world and the way of Jesus. The world tells us to protect ourselves, prove ourselves, and make sure we come out on top. Jesus speaks a very different word.

          He talks openly about suffering, rejection, and laying down his life. Peter recoils at that language, and honestly, many of us do too. It does not sound practical. It does not sound strong. But Jesus is not describing failure. He is showing us the shape of love.

          That matters because freedom through surrender to God does not mean passivity or pretending pain does not exist. It means loosening our grip on the illusion that we can control everything. It means trusting that God can hold what we cannot.

          2. Freedom through surrender to God changes how we see ourselves

          Jesus says, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves, take up their cross and follow me.” Those words can sound heavy at first, but the heart of them is not self-hatred. It is release.

          So much of our exhaustion comes from constant self-focus. We worry about how we are perceived. We compare. We defend. We keep score. We carry pressure that was never meant to define us. The sermon named this honestly and invited us into freedom through surrender to God as a different way of being human.

          “It’s only when we serve that we experience freedom.”

          When we stop building life around ourselves, we become more open to love. We become more available to other people. We begin to discover that surrender is not about becoming less valuable. It is about becoming more open to grace.

          3. Freedom through surrender to God reaches every part of life

          This week’s teaching also connected surrender to the Jesus Creed: loving God with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength and loving our neighbors as ourselves. That means surrender is not only emotional or spiritual in a vague sense. It touches every part of life.

          Personally, we surrender our hearts and souls to God. We let him meet us in the places where we are afraid, defensive, or guarded.

          “You surrender. You don’t give up. You let go.”

          Mentally, we surrender our minds. We do not simply collect more information about God. We open ourselves to experiencing God and being changed by him.

          Physically, we surrender our strength and resources. That includes our bodies, our habits, our money, our possessions, and the ways we use what we have. freedom through surrender to God becomes practical when we begin asking, “How can my whole life be offered back to God in love”

          4. Freedom through surrender to God leads us toward hope

          One of the most important parts of the message was the reminder that Peter seemed to miss: Jesus did not only say he would suffer and die. He also said he would rise again.

          That is where Christian hope lives. Surrender is not the end of the story. Resurrection is. The way of Jesus includes pain, but it does not end there. God brings life out of what looks lost. He brings hope where we expect only disappointment.

          That is why communion, also called Eucharist, matters so much in this season. Eucharist simply means a prayerful act of thanksgiving at the table of Jesus. As we come to the table, we remember both surrender and hope. We remember the love of Christ given for us, and we respond by placing our own lives in his hands.


          Practicing This Week

          • Pray one simple prayer each day: “God, show me where I need freedom through surrender to you in my life this week.”
          • Read Mark 8 slowly and notice where you feel resistance to Jesus’ invitation.
          • Name one area you are gripping tightly right now and talk honestly with God about it.
          • Look for one way to serve someone this week without needing recognition in return.
          • As you come to worship or prayer, offer God these words: “I surrender myself personally, mentally, and physically.”

          Questions for Reflection

          • Where in your life are you most tempted to hold on tightly instead of trusting God?
          • What do you think you might lose if you surrender more fully to Jesus?
          • How have control, comparison, or self-protection been affecting your peace?
          • What might freedom through surrender to God look like in your relationships or daily decisions?
          • What part of the hope of Jesus feels most important for you right now?

          Jesus does not shame us for struggling to let go. He meets us there with grace. The invitation this week was not to try harder or pretend to be fearless. It was to trust that freedom through surrender to God is not a loss of self, but a path into deeper peace, deeper love, and deeper life in Christ. Wherever this message meets you today, may you know that Jesus is patient with you, present with you, and still leading you toward hope.

          How to find self-control

          From Appetite to Freedom: How to Find Self-Control in Everyday Life

          This week’s teaching explored how to find self-control when our appetites start to run our lives—whether it’s substances, food, sex, shopping, screens, or the need to be right. We were invited to rediscover fasting as an ancient, practical, Jesus-shaped way to strengthen our ability to say no to destructive cravings and yes to God’s life-giving freedom.

          This Week’s Sermon: Finding Self-Control


          Key Takeaways

          • how to find self-control starts by naming the appetites that are trying to take the driver’s seat in your life.
          • Self-control is like a muscle, and fasting is a consistent workout that strengthens it over time.
          • Fasting helps reorder our desires so that our hunger for God becomes the deepest hunger again.
          • In Scripture, fasting creates space to seek God, repent honestly, and surrender control to the Spirit.
          • Lent is an ideal season to start small, practice with grace, and let God form real freedom in you.

          Sermon Highlights: How to Find Self-Control

          Most of us don’t decide to lose control. It happens gradually: a habit that starts as a comfort, a craving that becomes a pattern, a “just this once” that slowly becomes the default. One day you’re choosing something. The next day it feels like it’s choosing you.

          That tension is exactly where this week’s teaching met us: how to find self-control when you suspect something inside you is sometimes more in charge than you are. For some, that struggle is obvious and costly. For others, it’s subtle and socially acceptable. But the question is the same for all of us: do you want to be free?

          Big Idea of This Week’s Teaching

          How to find self-control is not mainly about stronger willpower. It’s about training your desires with God, so that your appetite for God becomes the deepest desire again—and your other appetites take their proper place.


          Key Scriptures

          • Proverbs 25:28 — A person without self-control is like a city with broken-down walls. This image framed self-control as protection and stability, not restriction.
          • Matthew 4:1–2 — Jesus prepared for temptation by fasting forty days and forty nights. Fasting was presented as training that strengthens the self-control muscle.
          • 2 Chronicles 20:3 — Jehoshaphat proclaimed a fast to seek God when fear and pressure were overwhelming. Fasting was shown as a way to quiet noise and listen.
          • Jonah 3:5–8 — Nineveh fasted as part of repentance and turning from violence. Fasting was connected to sincere change, not performative guilt.
          • Galatians 5:22–25 — Self-control is fruit of the Spirit, not a product of sheer willpower. This grounded self-control in partnership with God.
          • Romans 12:1 — Offer your bodies as a living sacrifice. Fasting was framed as an embodied way to surrender, not just a mental intention.

          1. How to find self-control by naming what is ruling you

          The teaching began with a story many of us recognize in different forms: a talented, successful person who still becomes a slave to an appetite. The point wasn’t to single out one kind of addiction, but to name a reality: appetites are powerful. They can be good servants, but terrible masters.

          So the first step in how to find self-control is gentle honesty. What appetite do you struggle to say no to? Food, alcohol, substances, sex, shopping, screens, drama, approval, control, comfort, being right—what tends to pull you off-center? The goal isn’t shame. The goal is clarity, because you can’t regain the driver’s seat if you won’t look at what keeps grabbing the wheel.

          2. How to find self-control by understanding your appetites

          A key part of the message was that appetites live at different layers of our being.

          Some appetites are bodily and loud: hunger, thirst, sleep, pleasure. Others are mental and emotional: approval, admiration, control, winning, comfort. But beneath those is something deeper: the appetite of the spirit, the heart, the will—the place of ultimate desire.

          When that deepest desire is for God, the rest of life finds its order. But when something else takes that place—when a good thing becomes the ultimate thing—everything starts to bend around it. That’s when life feels chaotic, compulsive, and out of control.

          This is why how to find self-control is not just behavior management. It’s spiritual formation. It’s learning to reorder desire so that God is at the center again.

          3. How to find self-control through fasting as training

          If self-control is a muscle, it makes sense that it grows through practice. You don’t get stronger by wishing you were strong. You get stronger by training.

          That’s why fasting mattered so much in this teaching. Before Jesus began his public ministry, he fasted in the wilderness. He didn’t fast because food is bad. He fasted because he was preparing to face temptation without being ruled by it.

          How to find self-control starts with naming what keeps grabbing the wheel and choosing training over shame.

          Fasting is the choice to say no to a basic appetite for a time, so you can say yes to God more clearly. And because food is concrete and immediate, practicing restraint there can strengthen your ability to practice restraint elsewhere. Over time, fasting forms you into someone who can pause, choose, and respond—rather than react and spiral.

          That’s a hopeful vision of how to find self-control: not instant transformation, but real formation.

          4. How to find self-control by seeking, repenting, and surrendering

          The sermon showed three biblical reasons people fast that connect directly to self-control.

          First, we fast to seek God. Fasting reduces the mental noise that constantly demands attention and creates space to listen. And when you actually hear from God, obedience becomes less like white-knuckling and more like walking with guidance.

          Fasting is not about proving strength to God; it’s about making space for God to form strength in you.

          Second, we fast to repent. In quiet and discomfort, patterns rise to the surface. We see what we’ve excused, minimized, or ignored. Fasting doesn’t earn forgiveness—Jesus already secured that. But fasting can help us take repentance seriously, and repentance breaks the grip of sin.

          Third, we fast to surrender. Here’s the paradox the sermon named: controlling yourself is not something you can do alone. True self-control grows when you yield ultimate control to God. Galatians 5 calls self-control fruit of the Spirit. That means it’s produced through relationship and partnership, not performance.


          Practicing This Week

          1. Choose one simple fast during Lent: skip one meal per week between now and Easter.
          2. During that meal time, do something relational with God: pray, read Scripture slowly, take a quiet walk, or sit in silence.
          3. When hunger hits, use it as a prompt prayer: God, I want you more than I want comfort right now.
          4. Add one act of repentance: write down one specific thing to confess before you break your fast, then bring it to God with honesty.
          5. Keep it small, consistent, and private. This is training, not proving.

          Questions for Reflection

          1. Where in your life do you most feel the struggle of how to find self-control right now?
          2. Which appetite feels loudest for you lately—comfort, approval, control, distraction, food, something else?
          3. What might it look like to make space to seek God in the middle of a busy week?
          4. Is there a pattern you sense God inviting you to repent from, not with shame but with hope?
          5. What would surrender look like in one specific decision you’re facing right now?

          If you hear the invitation to fasting and feel intimidated, start where you are. God is not impressed by heroic hunger; God is forming willing hearts. The good news is that you were created for freedom, and Jesus is not only your Savior—he is also your teacher. As you practice how to find self-control, you are not doing it alone. The Spirit is at work, growing something real in you, one small, faithful step at a time.

          How Christians live by the Holy Spirit and experience freedom

          Freedom Over Rules: Living by the Spirit

          To live by the Holy Spirit is not about following more rules—it’s about freedom shaped by grace. This week at The Journey, we explored Galatians 5 and how Jesus invites us to release rule-based faith and learn a Spirit-led way of living.

          This Week’s Sermon: What Are the Rules of Life?


          Key Takeaways

          • We all create “fence rules” to feel safe or right—but they can replace grace with judgment.
          • Paul warns that trying to be “justified” by rules leads to a new kind of slavery and an “us vs. them” posture.
          • Christian freedom isn’t “do whatever you want”—it’s learning to live led by the Holy Spirit.
          • The real contrast isn’t “my rules vs. your rules,” but flesh vs. Spirit—self-centered living vs. Spirit-shaped character.
          • The goal is visible fruit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control—“against such things there is no law.”

          Sermon Highlights: The Rules We Live By

          Most of us are rule-followers… even if we don’t think we are. Put us in a new job, a new relationship, a new community—even a new hobby—and we start asking: What are the rules here? What’s expected? What’s allowed? What counts as “doing it right”?

          And the tricky part is: the same rule can mean totally different things to different people. “I’ll see you at 7:00” can mean “arrive at 6:45,” “arrive at 7:00,” or “7:20 is basically the same thing.” We all live with unspoken rules—and we often assume our version is the correct one.

          This week at The Journey in Westminster, we started a new series by talking about rules, grace, and the freedom Jesus offers. Because when it comes to faith, the stakes feel higher—and the confusion can get louder: What does it mean to live like a Christian? Which rules matter most? And what do we do when people disagree?

          The Big Idea of This Week’s Teaching

          The heart of the message was simple and freeing: Jesus didn’t set us free so we’d just find a new set of rules to obsess over. Jesus set us free for freedom—so we can live by grace, led by the Holy Spirit.

          Rules can be good. Standards can be good. The problem is what happens when rules become our identity, our measuring stick, and our way of judging ourselves—and everyone else. That’s when “faith” can quietly shift into something else: fear, self-righteousness, and “us vs. them.”

          Paul’s invitation in Galatians 5 is not to throw out morality, but to stop being enslaved by rule-keeping as the way we prove we’re okay. Instead, we learn to walk with God’s Spirit—so our lives become shaped from the inside out.


          Key Scriptures

          • Exodus 20 (The Ten Commandments) — The pastor pointed out that the commandments are good “codes of community,” but people often add “fence rules” around them that become the real rule—and a new basis for judgment.
          • Galatians 5:1 — “It is for freedom that Christ has set us free.” This anchored the message: grace frees us from being yoked to rule-based righteousness.
          • Galatians 5:4–6 (themes in the passage) — Paul warns that trying to be “justified by the law” alienates us from Christ and moves us away from grace—not because God stops loving us, but because we lose our way.
          • Galatians 5:13–18 — Freedom isn’t permission to indulge selfishness; it’s an invitation to be led by the Spirit rather than controlled by the flesh.
          • Galatians 5:19–23 — The contrast between the works of the flesh and the fruit of the Spirit shows what life looks like when we’re driven by self vs. shaped by God.

          1. The “Fence Rule” Problem: When Extra Rules Replace the Point

          One of the most relatable parts of the teaching was how easily we create rules around rules. Sometimes we do it because we want clarity. Sometimes we do it because we want control. Sometimes we do it because we’re anxious—and extra rules help us feel safe.

          The pastor gave a modern example: “Don’t drink and drive” is a good rule. But someone might add a fence rule: “Don’t drink if you might drive.” Then another fence rule: “Don’t drink at all.” Eventually the fences become the focus—and the original purpose gets lost.

          This same thing happened historically around the Sabbath command. “Do no work” became “don’t carry objects,” which became “don’t lift anything heavier than a dried fig.” The point wasn’t rest anymore—it was rule management.

          “Jesus didn’t set you free so you could obsess over the rules—He set you free for freedom.”

          And here’s where it gets personal: we may not write our fence rules down, but we still live by them. We build expectations for ourselves—and for others—and then we silently grade people based on standards God never actually assigned us to police.

          2. The Trap of “Being Right”: When Righteousness Turns into Self-Righteousness

          Paul uses strong language in Galatians 5 because he’s naming a real danger: when we try to be “justified” by rules, we end up yoked to a new kind of slavery. We start believing, If I follow the right rules, I’m right. If you don’t, you’re wrong.

          That’s where “us vs. them” takes root. We may call it theology, conviction, values, or “being biblical,” but the posture underneath can become self-righteousness: Look how right I am.

          The pastor offered a humble and needed reminder: all of us are wrong about some things—even things we feel confident about. It’s okay to not be perfect. It’s okay to be learning. And it’s okay to let other people be learning too.

          Paul’s warning isn’t meant to scare us into shame. It’s meant to wake us up: when rule-keeping becomes the center, we lose power and effectiveness. We stop living with grace. We can still look “religious,” but we become less like Jesus in the process.

          3. Freedom Isn’t “Anything Goes”: It’s Spirit-Led Living

          A big misconception Paul addresses is this: if we’re saved by grace, does that mean we can do whatever we want?

          Paul’s answer is no—not because God wants to control us, but because selfish living always leads to breakdown. It fractures relationships. It feeds addiction. It fuels resentment. It creates conflict. It leaves us restless and unhappy.

          So Paul reframes the entire battle. It’s not “my rules vs. your rules.” It’s flesh vs. Spirit. Not “me vs. them,” but what’s happening inside me: am I being led by God, or led by my impulses, ego, and appetites?

          And the pastor took time to explain the Holy Spirit in a simple way: God is not far away. In Jesus, God came near—“Emmanuel, God with us.” And through the Holy Spirit, God is not only with us, but in us. If you’re a follower of Christ, you’re never navigating life alone. You can ask for wisdom. You can ask for help. You can ask God to reshape your character from the inside.

          4. What It Means to Live by the Holy Spirit

          Paul’s list of the “acts of the flesh” is long—and honestly, it’s sobering. But the pastor pointed out something important: Paul isn’t just handing us a new rule list. These lists vary from letter to letter because they’re diagnostic, not performative. They reveal what kind of life we’re living.

          Then comes the hopeful contrast: the fruit of the Spirit.
          Love. Joy. Peace. Patience. Kindness. Goodness. Faithfulness. Gentleness. Self-control.

          “When the Spirit shapes your life, the fruit becomes obvious—and against such things there is no law.”

          This is what grace produces when it’s actually shaping us. Not perfection, but transformation. Not an “image,” but fruit—visible, tangible, recognizable.

          And Paul ends with a stunning line: “Against such things there is no law.”
          In other words, when the Spirit is forming your life, you don’t need a fence. You don’t need to build an “us vs. them” identity. You’re not trying to prove you’re right—you’re learning how to live like Jesus.


          Practicing This Week: Walking with the Holy Spirit in Everyday Life

          Here are a few ways to respond this week, rooted in what the pastor invited us to do:

          1. Ask for freedom in prayer.
            Take a few quiet minutes and pray honestly: “Holy Spirit, where do I need freedom right now?”
          2. Notice your “fence rules.”
            Where have extra rules become your measuring stick—either for yourself or for others? Ask: Is this leading me toward grace… or toward judgment?
          3. Pick one fruit of the spirit to practice on purpose.
            Choose one: patience, kindness, self-control, gentleness, etc. Ask God for help, then look for one real-life moment to practice it.
          4. Trade “us vs. them” thoughts for a Spirit-check.
            When you feel judgment rising, pause and ask: What would it look like to respond with grace? What might the Spirit be forming in me right now?
          5. Make one “kindness in action” move.
            Send the text. Offer the help. Give the encouragement. Do something concrete that looks like love.

          Questions for Reflection

          1. Where in your life do you feel most tempted to turn faith into rules—either for yourself or for other people?
          2. What “fence rules” have you absorbed over the years that may not actually be the heart of Jesus?
          3. When you feel the pull of “us vs. them,” what’s usually underneath it—fear, insecurity, anger, past hurt?
          4. Which fruit of the Spirit do you most want others to experience when they’re around you right now? Why?
          5. What is one area where you want to ask the Holy Spirit for wisdom and change this week?

          When we live by the Holy Spirit, our lives slowly shift from rule-keeping to grace-filled freedom, and the fruit becomes visible over time. The hope of this message isn’t that we’ll finally follow the rules perfectly. The hope is Jesus—who meets us with grace, even when we’re confused, stuck, or wrong. And as we learn to walk with the Holy Spirit, we don’t have to carry the burden of proving we’re “right.” We get to live free—together—growing into a life that looks more and more like love.